Monthly Archives: June 2012

Human Connection

I was just sitting down in this coffee shop when I saw a rare sight: across the shop, in a smaller cafe, a man approached a woman. He leaned down, and he kissed her forehead. As he moved a little closer to her, we saw a wedding ring in his finger. The similar ring apparently was seen in the woman’s finger, too.
He chatted with her, sipped her drink a little, and she got up. They walked together, he held her hand, smiled. He didn’t look at her, and neither did she. But his smile showed he responded to whatever she said, perhaps summarizing all the things she went through in a day’s work.

I couldn’t help staring at them. One thing is missing in the couple’s interaction: gadget. Either running out of battery or simply put in their bags, we did not see them.

In comparison, here I am, all alone waiting for my next work meeting, and heavily distracted by the sight I just saw. Immediately I took out my iPad and write about that heavenly view.
On the other hand, on a table next to mine, two students in their uniform look bored with each other other, and they have been sitting in silence, playing with their own gadgets.

The students are still here. Yet what lingers on my mind the most is the sight of that married couple, who effortlessly show affection amidst crazy hectic day, especially this town on a Friday afternoon.

Don’t you just miss genuine human connection?

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Posted by on 06/22/2012 in English, Personal


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A Wedding, and Its Memories

I am writing this entry as I am still reeling from the atmosphere of my little sister’s somewhat big wedding.

For the past two days, we had nothing but this wedding in our mind.
For some, such as my family and those who help organizing it, the wedding had been on their minds for the past few weeks and months.
For the bride and the groom, the wedding had also been on their minds for the past year when they decided to tie the knot.
For me, the wedding has been lingering on my conscience, meaning that I had been made aware of the wedding for some time. But not only in the past few minutes ago I realize that a wedding like this is a big deal.

Not exactly a fan of big wedding myself, I made my way into it by benefitting from the obvious, natural status as a member of the hosting family. Once stepped in, I felt lost. Everyone was busy, but me. Eventually I was made busy as well, but only to a miniscule portion of what others had done greatly.

The awareness started kicking in when the wedding ceremony happened. I was made to sit next to dad before he gave his daughter to the hand of marriage.
Awkward, yes, but the uncomfortable position also made me realize that a son has to learn being a good guardian to his family in every small step. As I get to witness my sister signed the note of marriage legally from a very close sight, it is clear that she also signs an approval note that part of my duty being a brother to her has now been taken over by someone else.
Someone whom she is expected to spend the rest of this lifetime with. Someone who will be her first immediate contact in any given circumstances.

The adjustment period did not even start yet when we had to prepare for the wedding reception the next day, a day after the ceremony. The aforementioned status as a family member only prompted organizers to point me as one of ushers to bring the newlyweds to the stage, and to welcome guests who came to greet the couple. As guests walked past me, I struggled to recall names and faces from distant relatives, neighbors, old family friends, to which I mostly failed. My other sister helped me to memorize the names to an already forgotten effect by now.

But what I won’t forget is the joyful faces of aunts, uncles, nephews, nieces and cousins who cheered the wedding from their smiles.
Coming from different cities and islands, they reunited in this wedding, albeit briefly.

“Your belated aunt must be proud seeing her children gather again today, unexpectedly,” my other aunt pointed out. I could not agree more.

When we posed for a group photo, my mind flew briefly to big Lebaran gatherings we always did years ago, back when the elders were still around. As one by one departed, the tradition slowly fades out, but apparently, the memory is not.

The price for embracing the nostalgia is the intrusion of privacy we often get. But then the more I thought about it, the more I realize that it may take a while for both our ability to convey our choice, and for them to accept what we have chosen.

Then again, this note is made as I am still reeling from the euphoria of a wedding.
It may not make me wanting to do the same for myself, but it is the exuberant joy of seeing our present family members, both close and extended ones, that make such event sticks to our mind as long as we live.

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Posted by on 06/18/2012 in English, Personal


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Suroboyo Airlines (for Javanese only)

Tulisan iki mung iso diwoco ambek sing iso boso Jowo, terutama Jowo Timuran. Lebih mantep nek iso Suroboyoan. Sing isone boso Jowo alus, yo sepurane ae, cak, mbambong ae.

Sa’jane iki lho kerjaane Cita, aku mek nyebarno ae. Cita iki koncoku, rek, dikenalno ambek Hendri, jarene “kalian sama-sama Arema”. Awal-awal sek jaim, yo. Eh mari ngono, wis ambrol kabeh koyo bendungan buanjir! Jan kene nek nggedabrus ndhek BBM iso ngomong sembarang kalir. Iku BBM nek ceblok opo dicolong, wasalam ae reputasine kene nek didelok BBM Chat-e. Nggilani yo, Cit?

Nah salah satu kerjaane Cita nek lagek horny iki yo ngirimi humor-humor sing luwih nggilani soko iki. Tapi percoyo koen, sing paling top markotop yo Suroboyo Airlines iki! Pas pertama nrimo, aku wis arep ngomong, “jianciiiik!” sampe ngguyu kemekelen. Mung sadar yo pas meeting, arep dipentung be’e!
Bar tak woco bolak-bolak, cuk, wuasu tenan joke iki, sek iso gawe ngakak sampe saiki!

Wis wocoen ae. Thanks a lot, Cita! *lah, sek keminggris*

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Posted by on 06/14/2012 in Uncategorized


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Step Back, Step Forward

Once in a while, you find someone you are crazily attracted to. Someone you are dying to be with every minute of the day.
Someone you have a huge crush on, so huge that you overwhelm yourself with ideas and thoughts far beyond your wildest dreams.
Someone you are mad about.
Someone you crave to have.

When you find that someone, step back.
Don’t move forward, but take a step backward.

Once the euphoria dies down, you begin to see what once was flawless is now flawed.
You begin to see what once was tolerable is now intolerable.
You begin to see what once was lovely is now condemned.
You begin to see what once was compatible is now in doubt.

Everything that looks rosy now looks rotten.

When you find the time to realize that, step forward.
Don’t be hesitant, just take a bold step to the front line.

Truth comes when infatuation dies down.

We shall not cheat ourselves by becoming what the other person is like, because eventually we make him or her do things we do.
We confuse ourselves with the idea of liking someone for being like us, which is far from likeable.

Reality comes when we know the differences, and willingness to try to understand them.
Reality comes upon seeing real attitudes undisguised behind distant words.
Reality comes by the time we accept to embrace changes, and finally give in.

After all, love is reality, not just a dream.

Once in a while, we find that someone who is willing to wait together for love to bloom, instead of prolonged maddening crush.

When you find that someone, stay.
Now, you can step forward together.


Posted by on 06/13/2012 in Personal