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12 Sep

When he was about to hang up the phone, he said, “Selamat merenung ya pak!”.

Merenung? I just awoke from my delayed deep sleep due to the continuous buzz of incoming text messages on my mobile.

But what came afterwards was much more than the process of ‘merenung’ or what I’d like to describe it as ‘taking as much time as you need to sit back, think of what you’ve been doing’. It was a matter of taking decisions, a time when you are no longer able to walk in the grey area.

Yes. Can you? Why?! OK, but … Wait! What if …?

If love flows like a river, will you let yourself drowned?

If tip-toeing through the fine line of in-between helps you avoiding constant constipation of a structured relationship, will you do it for the rest of your life and keep covering yourself from the glaring heat of reality?

If distance is shortened, will it make things easier to handle and guarantee you that things will work well like the way both of you want it to be?

If one’s wish fails to fulfill the desire of other party, which one to push, and how you decide which?

Sejuta pertanyaan untuk cinta yang sebenernya ga pernah terjawabkan dalam suatu bentuk kepastian karena cinta … Bukankah ia akan selalu berevolusi, berkembangbiak, berakar, berpindah, berlabuh, berteduh, beranjak, bertapa, bermain, beraduan, berapa banyak lagi yang harus terungkap?

“yang kumau/ada dirimu/tapi tak begini keadaannya/yang kumau selalu denganmu/jika Tuhan mau begini/robahlah semua jadi yang kumau/karena kuingin semua berjalan/seperti yang kumau”– KD ‘Yang Kumau’

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Posted by on 09/12/2004 in English, Personal

 

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